Hermione Goes to Court
Harry Potter and Hermione Granger stand in the cobbled courtyard of Hogwarts. The clouds are stitching together into a gloomy quilt that stretches low over their heads.
“This weather looks ominous,” Hermione says. Harry nods his head in agreement, though he has no clue what ‘ominous’ means.
Hermione bites her lip in frustration. “Where’s Ron? That idiot told us to meet here as soon as Potions class got over!”
“Maybe he just got distracted,” Harry kindly points out. He smiles at Hermione’s scathing look.
* * *
It’s just another day at the School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and Ron Weasley is bored. Advanced History of Magic class really is a snore. He should never have let Hermione talk him into this. Professor Binns never closes his pie hole, and barely even pauses for breath. Why can’t Ron take Potions with Harry and Hermione? He doesn’t like the idea of those two together. Alone. Without him. Ron spins his quill agitatedly between freckled fingers.
When class finally ends, he pushes his way past all the first- and second-year students jamming the stairways. He trips on someone’s shoes–Bloody ‘ell!—and scrabbles against the nearest wall to keep from falling down the endless stairs. Regaining his balance, Ron notes a poster tacked to the wall with Magic Tape, which only comes off with a secret spell.
It’s neon yellow and screams “BATTLE OF THE MAGIC BANDS! WIN GLORY, FAME, AND EVEN A RARE AND MAGICAL PRIZE FROM DUMBLEDORE HIMSELF! ANY BAND CAN JOIN!”
Ron has an idea. A grin spreads across his face as he runs through the hallways.
* * *
Harry spots Ron just as he rushes into the near-empty courtyard, red-faced and smiling.
“There you are, Ron!” Hermione exclaims, “It could rain on us any minute!”
“Blimey, I’ve only just got out of class,” Ron says, looking entreatingly at Harry.
Harry shrugs.
Ron continues, “I’ve just had the best idea ever. I wanted to maybe sneak off and play tricks on Draco, or something, but now I’ve got a bloody awesome plan!”
“This better not be like your idea last week to steal into Snape’s office and take some potions,” Hermione smiles. “That didn’t end up so well for you.”
Ron rubs his backside ruefully, “Yeah, well, it’s not like that this time. I’m thinking we should enter the Battle of the Bands. Guys, let’s start a bloody band!”
Harry looks surprised, “But Ron, none of us know how to play any instruments.”
“I can play piano,” Hermione chimes in. Harry and Ron look at each other. They erupt into guffaws.
“Well, then how do you expect us to start a band?” She jabs her finger into Ron’s chest.
“Ouch!” Ron thinks for a moment. “I guess we could do what lots of Muggle bands are doing, you know, that remixing stuff. It sounds cool.”
“Oh, that? But no magical bands do that kind of music,” Harry objects.
“Exactly,” Ron smirks, “that’s exactly why it’d make us the best band ever heard at Hogwarts!”
Hermione cocks an eyebrow. “You know, I think you have something here, Ron,” she says. “How do we start, though?”
Ron, Harry and Hermione discuss the idea, moving inside when raindrops begin to speckle their black robes.
Eventually, Harry comes up with an idea. “We could all go to a Muggle concert. That way we could record what they play and just use it for our music.”
Ron wonders how they would get to the different concerts.
Hermione frowns. “We could just Apparate. We all know how to do that. At least, well enough,” She snorts at Ron, who turns bright red and splutters about the evils of Apparition.
“It’s settled then,” says Harry, “now we just have to decide which concerts we want to see, and when.”
Harry, Ron, and Hermione decide to Apparate to the Seattle Music Festival in Seattle, Washington, US. Some of the artists performing there will be Snoop Dog, Deadmau5, Modest Mouse, and Empire of the Sun.
* * *
Harry, Ron, and Hermione Apparate right into the middle of a raging crowd near the concert stage. The noises from Apparating are drowned out by the sound of Deadmau5 performing, and no one in the wild crowd notices the sudden appearance of three people.
“I love this song!” Ron shouts as he is jolted sideways by the surging mosh-pit crowd.
“Let’s get out of here!” Hermione screams before she is shoved and falls. Ron catches her deftly and pushes his way out of the pit. The three find standing room beyond the moshers, breathing heavily.
Hermione straightens up and takes her wand from her purse.
“Hide me while I perform the spell,” she commands Harry and Ron. Harry links arms with Ron, who looks insanely pleased to be doing such an outrageously Muggle thing.
Hermione intones something beneath the thudding base of the song, waving her wand in small, neat circles. She repeats the spell for the duration of the concert, each artist getting his own incantation. When the concert is over, exhausted Hermione and ecstatic Ron grab Harry’s arm, and they vanish, unnoticed by the crowd.
* * *
“What spell did you use, Hermione?” Ron asks as they sit in the Griffindor Common Room the next day.
“Oh, it was just a little incantation I found in the library,” Hermione says, closing a large book she is reading, “Nothing too complicated.”
Harry walks up and settles into a cushy armchair across from Hermione.
“Capto musica,” Hermione continues proudly, “Capture music.”
“Well, now that she’s had time to brag,” Ron says, “Let’s get down to making this music.”
* * *
Harry, Ron and Hermione spend the next few days arranging the pieces of the songs Hermione captured in her wand. Each song, unravelling from her wand like glittery, translucent banners, is a different glowing color and has a different length. Together, the three cut and position pieces of the songs to form new songs. Harry even discovers they can layer the songs. Eventually, the three have created three songs they really like.
“This was fun,” Hermione says, eyes glittering with excitement.
Harry laughs, “We actually did it! We have to win Battle of the Magical Bands now!”
“But what’re we naming our band?” Ron asks.
* * *
Double H & R, a band new to the Battle competition this year, debuts its first mini album Unicorn Blood during the Battle of the Magical Bands. The three songs are a huge hit, and Double H & R is crowned winner of the competition. The band members are awarded with three passes to limitless Butterbeer at the Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade.
Wizards and witches throughout Hogwarts can’t get enough of Ron, Harry, and Hermione’s music. Harry, more familiar with technology than the others, makes CD disks with the three songs from Unicorn Blood, and the Ron decides to sell them for £5 each.
“It’s just so different!” Harry hears Lavender Brown tell Seamus in Potions one day.
The songs are such a hit they even spread to the Muggle world. Ron, whose dad has just installed Wi-Fi at home, is able to put the songs up on the Internet over Christmas holiday. Soon, they are number-one hits, getting all sorts of publicity on numerous websites around the world.
* * *
One day, Hermione gets a message via owl.
“But you never get mail, Hermione!” Ron exclaims.
“Yeah, this is really strange,” Harry agrees.
“If you two would be quiet for a minute, I’d let you know what it’s about,” Hermione says, examining the neat, official-looking letter. “This is quite odd,” she says, looking perplexed, “it’s addressed from the artist DeadMau5! That’s one of the artists we recorded.”
Harry and Ron glance excitedly at each other; sure that fame in the Muggle world is soon to be theirs.
When Hermione closes the letter and puts her head in her hands, the boys are alarmed.
“What is it?”
“Would you tell us what the bloody thing says already?”
Hermione looks dolefully at them between fingers. “It’s a cease-and-desist letter, from Deadmau5. He says we have to stop using his music or…or...” she begins to cry.
“Or what?” Ron asks, awkwardly patting Hermione’s back.
“Or he’ll take us to court and sue us!”
Harry and Ron’s mouths drop open.
Ron sputters, “Can they do that? Can they take wizards to court? There must be something we can do.”
Hermione shakes her head, scattering tears on the table. “It says, unless we stop making music and take down all of it off the Internet, he’s going to sue us for copyright infringement.”
“Then we’re doomed,” Harry says. “We can’t possibly take down our stuff from the web. It’s spread everywhere.”
Hermione says mournfully, “And Dumbledore can’t even help us. He’s been gone on a trip and who knows how long he’ll be away.”
Harry, Ron, and Hermione share a despairing glance, unsure of what to do.
* * *
Studying up on copyright and piracy, Hermione becomes increasingly alarmed by the complexity of copyright law. Countless hours in the Muggle library and on the computer are spent to discover just what she is in trouble for. Finally, she finds a website for teaching Muggle copyright to kids, called www.teachingcopyright.org, created by the Electronic Frontier Foundation (EFF). Although Hermione really doesn’t need copyright law to be simplified for her, she finds the site is a great place for beginners. It is a good supplement to the website for the Intellectual Property Office, www.ipo.gov.uk, and the UK copyright law website, www.copyrightservice.co.uk.
Hermione reads up on everything from the public domain to fair use, taking copious notes for her court case, during which she knows she will be asked to defend herself. Secretly, she doesn’t really trust her family’s attorney, who trembles when he talks and always wipes spittle from his mouth with a spotted handkerchief. He seems a nervous sort of fellow.
She realizes exactly how the plaintiff’s attorneys will try to convince the jury of her guilt.
The Teaching Copyright site states that copyright “is a form of legal protection automatically provided to the authors of “original works of authorship,” including literary, dramatic, musical, and artistic works” (EFF). Fair use, Hermione learns, is decided by courts on a case-by-case basis” according to the UK’s copyright laws (Copyright Services, UK). One of the restricted acts according to UK copyright law is “adaptation,” which, Hermione realizes, is exactly what she, Ron, and Harry have done. They adapted Deadmau5’s music and even sold it for a profit to other students.
According to the Copyright, Designs and Patent Act of 1988, Hermione is guilty of a number of criminal offenses. One offense was “distributing otherwise than in the course of a business to such an extent as it affects prejudicially the owner of copyright” (107)(1)(e). The only way she could fight this one is by showing how Deadmau5’s music sales were not negatively affected by Double H&R’s music—in fact, their music made sales go up. She has her attorney research the numbers (he seemed impressed by her suggestion to do so).
The next offense would be “infringing copyright in a work by communicating the work to the public…to such an extent as to affect prejudicially the owner of copyright” (107(2A)). Again, if her attorney can prove Unicorn Blood is not hurting Deadmau5’s sales, she might be able to get past this one, too.
Another offense Hermione is sure will be brought against her would be “committing an offence without sufficient consent” (Bullocks, Hermione thinks, We didn’t ask Deadmau5 if it was ok to use his music!). This section explicitly states she can be found guilty if she “imports into the United Kingdom otherwise than for her private and domestic use” (198(1)(a)+(b)).
Dismayed, Hermione finds other offenses like this one. She calls her attorney with her fears, but he hums and hedges, and Hermione hangs up feeling depressed; she can’t think of any way to get around these types of offenses without having a flawless alibi claiming she had no knowledge of infringement. Damn. If only I could claim I went to a School for Magic instead of a Muggle school, Hermione thinks. I hope Wright will come up with something clever.
* * *
Hermione sits in a European Muggle courtroom, wearing her nicest Muggle clothes. She fidgets in her chair, more unsure of herself than she’s ever been before. Convincing Ron and Harry she should go to court (because she knows what to do) was not difficult. If anyone should go, after all, it was her. However, Ron and Harry don’t know that she plans to take the blame of all of this herself, if anything goes wrong. She knows she needs to do it—Harry and Ron need to stay in school—but she’s not sure what will happen to her if she loses this case. How could she possibly win a case against an artist with millions of dollars?
The older judge rattles off words, perhaps something important, but Hermione can’t focus. Her attorney, hired for her by her parents, sits next to her. The man, Mr. Wright, perpetually looks a few shades too pale. He offered to do this for her parents to repay a debt he owed them. Although skeptical of his capability, Hermione is grateful; without his gift, the Grangers would currently be bankrupt.
She concedes Mr. Wright probably feels as overwhelmed by this case as she does.
* * *
“Would the defendant Miss Granger please step to the podium,” the judge asks her. She notices he has a small smile on his face, perhaps meant to encourage her.
Hermione, shaking from nervousness, keeps her chin high as she stands behind the podium. She feels so small. But her eyes glint with determination. She won’t let Ron and Harry down!
She answers every question Deadmau5’s attorneys ask her during the cross-examination, keeping in mind all she knows from her studies. Still, Hermione can tell they are asking her all the right questions. She begins to fear that despite everything, she will lose the case.
Eventually, Mr. Wright stands up, handkerchief in clammy hand, and gives Hermione’s testimony. He claims the defendant did not know copyright laws, due to poor homeschooling (Oh, clever man! Hermione thinks), and thus did not willingly commit infringement. He also shares the data about Deadmau5’s sales she asked him to look into, although it is a far shakier premise than she had hoped for.
Deadmau5’s attorneys rebut with numbers of their own, which sound researched and scientific and show how sales have dropped, by .5%. Hermione can’t believe her ears.
Can they fake evidence? She wonders. Perhaps Deadmau5 has enough money to fabricate the research, or pay someone to, or something. She lets out an exasperated huff.
The trial continues far into the afternoon.
* * *
“Miss Hermione Granger has been found guilty of criminal Intellectual Property rights infringement according to the World Intellectual Property Organization Copyright Treaty…”
Hermione’s heart pounds in her chest. The judge continues to pronounce her sentence, his resigned expression stealing away her remaining hope. A fine of £50,000, the maximum penalty for willful copyright infringement. Jail time, six months.
Hermione is stunned. Deadmau5 has won. His attorneys are better and have deeper pockets, and they convinced the jury that she knowingly pirated Deadmau5’s music for commercial gain. She knows exactly how they did it, too—they focused on the fact that Unicorn Blood was sold for money, and that the songs used in the adaptation were knowingly copied from a concert. The jury didn’t swallow the homeschool alibi at all.
All her hours of studying didn’t save her. Tears slip from her eyes as she contemplates her future. An image of Ron flashes through her mind and she hopes she can see him before her jail time. She wonders if she will be able to continue her studies in a Muggle jail.
Suddenly, a sharp cry echoes faintly through the courtroom. The judge trails off into silence. Hermione perks up. She swears she’s heard that noise before—
“Bombarda Maxima!” CRASH.
A top corner of the courtroom explodes inward, raining debris onto everyone. Hermione screams. As she screams, a huge shape swoops into the room with a deafening screech.
“Ascendio!” a voice shouts through the ringing in Hermione’s ears, and she shoots up into the air, her screams increasing in pitch.
“Obliviate” another voice yells.
Unexpectedly, Hermione lands on something soft, warm and muscular. Two arms encircle her, holding her tight. She clutches the fabric before her as the muscular shape beneath her legs heaves upwards and soars through the hole in the ceiling, out into blue sky.
Hermione hears laughter. Ron’s laughter. Shocked, she swivels around to see that Ron is behind her, holding her to him. His red hair streams wildly in the wind.
“Woo, that was fun!” shouts the person in front of her, who, to her astonishment, is Harry. She looks down to see powerful, grey-feathered wings beating the air.
“Buckbeak? Ron, Harry? Wait, what-what just happened?” Hermione stutters.
“We’ll explain it all later,” Harry shouts over his shoulder. Hermione settles against Ron, in for a long ride, heart still furiously pounding.
* * *
“…So then we blew a hole in that bloody courtroom, flew right in and saved the day,” Ron explains over lunch.
“Ron did the Ascendio and Bombarda-Maximo spells, and I Obliviated everyone’s memory in the room,” Harry clarified. “That way, no one would remember what happened. I think my Obliviate spell was a pretty powerful one, I’m afraid.”
Ron smiles, “I don’t think you’ll be getting anymore stupid copyright letters for a while, Hermione.”
“You saved me!” Hermione beams. “You two are the greatest, did you know that?”
Harry and Ron smile back, “Yeah, we knew that.”
“No more music sampling for Double H & R, though, sorry to say,” Hermione continues.
Ron looks disgusted. “There must be a way we can mess with those idiotic laws, isn’t there?”
Harry laughs, “I think we’d be better off fighting You-Know-Who.”
Hermione smiles, “You know, I think you’re right.”
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